Sara Young and her husband have a controversial relationship practice that has earned them the label of being ‘mad.’ While it’s becoming more common for couples, especially married ones, to sleep in separate beds, Sara takes it a step further by continuing this trend even on holiday. According to statistics, 36% of couples spend nights apart due to disrupted sleep, such as excessive movement or snoring.
This trend, known as ‘sleep divorce,’ affects 1 in 10 couples. Snoring is reported to disrupt 23% of people, excessive heat affects 19%, and 13% are bothered by too much movement. Sara, 41, from Southampton, explains, “We’re a bit unusual as we like separate beds and rooms where possible – and yet we’re totally happy.” When they started dating, Carl’s snoring was an issue, and although they tried nose tapes and earplugs, they weren’t effective.
It was during the COVID-19 lockdown that Sara and Carl realized they needed a better solution. Sara was pregnant with their first child and needed more sleep. “Every relationship has a honeymoon period, and when it was over and we knew we were in it for the long haul, we needed a better solution,” Sara shares. Now, they always request twin beds in hotels to ensure Sara can sleep as far away from Carl and his snoring as possible. They often choose Airbnb as it can be more cost-effective to rent a two-room apartment than book two bedrooms in a hotel.
Sara and Carl have two children, and their sleeping arrangement even extends to their family holidays. “That way, we can have a room each and look after a child each. He takes our toddler, and I take our baby,” Sara explains. Their friends may think they’re mad, but they believe it’s the best decision they’ve ever made. They’re not alone in their choice, as a recent study of 2,000 Brits found that 29% now sleep in separate beds from their partners, and 18% prefer to book separate rooms even on holiday.
Contrary to what one might expect, these couples are happy with their arrangement. Annie Waldron, a relationship expert at The Best Dating Sites, explains that separate rooms during holidays can provide the necessary rest and rejuvenation, enhancing the overall experience while promoting communication and respect. “The rising trend of Brits opting for separate beds — and even separate rooms on holiday — is a reflection of a broader societal shift towards valuing personal wellbeing and autonomy within relationships,” says Annie.
FAMILY TRAVELS THE WORLD TOGETHER
In a groundbreaking move that challenges societal norms, one family has found a way to balance intimacy with individuality. By embracing the benefits of solo slumber, they have discovered that a little space can actually bring people closer.
Sara, a member of this unique family, believes that more couples would be happier if they didn’t share a bed. Society has placed an unrealistic expectation on couples to sleep together, but Sara argues that this doesn’t define the strength of a relationship.
“We both sleep well, and we’re both happy,” Sara explains. “We still have the same awesome relationship that other couples have, we literally just sleep in different beds.”
As this trend continues to gain momentum, it has the potential to redefine what it means to be “together” in the 21st century. It challenges the notion that physical proximity is the only way to foster intimacy and highlights the importance of individual space.
So, if you find yourself yearning for a good night’s sleep or simply crave some personal space, don’t be afraid to explore this unconventional approach to sleeping arrangements. Who knows, it may just bring you closer to your partner than ever before.
