SHOULD HE COME CLEAN? (Picture: This week we hear from a reader who admits to being ‘single and stupid’ when he ended up having sex with his brother’s wife.
Years later, the affair has been brushed under the carpet, and his brother is still married to the same woman.
But there’s just one problem: our reader is concerned that his nephew might be more closely related to him than everyone thinks.
Before you go, check out last week’s dilemma, from a woman who is starting to wonder if her SAS boyfriend might be lying to her…
THE PROBLEM…
It makes me cringe to say this, but four years ago I had an affair with my brother’s wife. I was single and stupid at the time, and he found out after just a few weeks. Needless to say, it caused a lot of heartache for all three us, as well as for my mum, whose shoulder he cried on. To this day, my dad doesn’t know.
Mum was instrumental in helping us rebuild our relationship, and although it took nearly a year, my brother finally agreed to give me another chance at being a better brother, and we try to act now as though nothing’s happened.
He’s still married to the same woman, and although I think she still has feelings for me, by necessity our relationship is now very cool. We don’t spend any time together, unless it’s some family get together, where we can’t avoid one another.
I’m now married to a lovely girl, who knows nothing of what went on. In fact, no one knows except the four of us, as we’ve kept the whole thing secret from wider family and friends.
The problem is that I torture myself, wondering whether my young nephew is really my child. The dates are right and he looks a lot like me.
My wife sadly can’t have children, and I find myself wanting a DNA test so I can put my mind at rest.
LAURA SAYS…
And then what? Even if your nephew turned out to be your biological son, I doubt you’d be able to ride off into the sunset with your sister-in-law and child to start a happy new life. The devastation caused by such a move would be immense, so unless you’re prepared to inflict a great deal of unhappiness on a lot of people (including you), forget this idea now.
It took a long time and much heartache to repair your relationship with your brother, and frankly you’re extremely lucky that he’s been willing to forgive you. As for your poor mother, she’d be broken, having worked so hard to rebuild the family only for it to be torn down again by you.
You say the dates are right and your nephew looks like you, but you don’t know when your sister-in-law had sex with her husband. Nor is it any surprise that the child shares a family resemblance with you; he probably looks like your brother too.
It’s heartbreaking to see you suffer from the unfortunate reality that your wife is unable to conceive. However, it is crucial not to let this ruin your marriage. Have you considered the options of adoption or surrogacy? There are numerous support groups available for individuals facing similar challenges, such as Gateway Women or the Fertility Network. Additionally, specialized therapy can provide valuable assistance.
Moreover, there are companies that offer discreet DNA testing services. Nevertheless, it is important to note that individuals must be at least 16 years old to voluntarily provide a DNA sample. Therefore, your sister-in-law would need to consent to providing your nephew’s DNA. I strongly advise against pursuing this route.
