EMILY SUPPORTS “ASKING FOR IT” CAMPAIGN TO CHANGE CONSENT LAWS
In a shocking revelation, a woman wakes up feeling violated and confused after a party, while a man hastily pulls up his trousers and scurries away. Astonishingly, he may attempt to justify his actions by claiming she didn’t explicitly say no. This defense could potentially get him off the hook for sexual assault or rape.
Clearly, this is not an acceptable model for consent. The focus should be on the actions and agreements made by both parties leading up to the sexual encounter. Simply put, there needs to be a clear yes, rather than just the absence of a no.
That’s why I am fully supporting the I’m Asking For It campaign, which seeks to change the law in England and Wales to an affirmative consent model. This means that explicit mutual permission would be required before engaging in any sexual activity.
However, I was taken aback by the negative response I received when I posted about the campaign on social media. Men reacted with immediate defensiveness, confusion, and self-righteousness, as if I was taking away their fun. They seemed to believe that making sex safer somehow infringed upon their rights.
This reaction served as a clear indication that our understanding of consent is severely distorted. It reaffirmed the urgent need for this law to be implemented.
EMILY SHOCKED BY GOVERNMENT’S RESPONSE TO CAMPAIGN
Emily, the founder of the Affirmative Consent campaign, was left stunned by the negative feedback she received after launching her initiative. However, nothing could have prepared her for the official response from the Government. In a dismissive statement, they declared that there were no plans to amend the law on consent. They argued that the current legislation is well-established and understood by courts, police, practitioners, and the public, providing victims with effective protection against sexual abuse.
This response left Emily feeling disheartened and frustrated. She believes that it is in every man’s interest for this law to change. Unfortunately, she fears that because it is a change desperately needed by women, it will continue to be ignored. In her experience, women have to fight harder and raise their voices louder to be heard and have their needs met. Sadly, this also applies to their safety.
The normalization of silencing women’s concerns and dismissing them as “whining” has not changed much over the years. While women now have more of a voice compared to the 1950s, it is still not enough. Emily highlights the stagnant progress in the UK when it comes to language and attitudes towards women. She shares her own experience on Instagram, where she encounters countless other women and girls facing similar challenges. Shockingly, their campaign revealed that 22% of UK adults believe that saying “no” can sometimes mean “yes” in the context of sex.
If the Government refuses to engage in a discussion about a simple suggestion for a legal change that could make sex safer and promote a clearer understanding of consent, what hope is there for progress? Emily raises concerns about the message this sends to young boys and girls. It is crucial to educate them about consent and ensure a safer future for all.
Statistics show that affirmative consent is making a difference in countries like Sweden. It’s time for a change in the law to show that sexual violence will not be tolerated. We need to shift the narrative around women and their words. No longer should it be a case of ‘his word against yours’. Our words should matter and be believed. It’s time to wake up and catch up.
The current model is failing rape victims. Less than 2% of reported rapes result in a conviction, essentially decriminalizing rape in the UK. An affirmative consent model would focus on whether consent was sought and given, rather than whether the person said no. This is a better solution, as proving a negative is the main reason rape cases fail.
Let’s face it, sometimes we are too afraid to say no, too intoxicated to speak, or even drugged. The idea of affirmative consent is not foreign. It’s already working in countries like Australia, Canada, and Spain. In Sweden, rape convictions increased by 75% after adopting the affirmative consent model. It’s clear that affirmative consent is a step in the right direction.
Emily is urging the Government to reconsider its stance. The safety of women and girls should not be ignored. Unfortunately, our concerns are often dismissed as ‘annoying feminist rants’. We need the support of the amazing men out there who stand with us. Don’t just deny being a rapist, actively help us make the necessary changes for a safer world.
This is not an attack on you, but a plea for support. We are tired of being attacked and not being believed. We need you to stand by us and believe us. Only then will our voices truly be heard. The world still listens more to men, and it’s time for that to change.
